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Alert: APB for 'Irregardless'
We continue to see this non-word in documents and hear it spoken by presidential candidates. Avoid it. Authorities consider it substandard. Use regardless instead.
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Can't Fool a Fool?
Your boss called and gave us this list, saying that if you don't get at least eight words, you're fired. Hey, it's just a job. Take your best shot and dust off your resume.
1. flavin: (a) any of various soluble glycoside pigments producing blue to red coloring in flowers and plants; (b) any of a genus (Pseudomonas) of gram-negative rod-shaped motile bacteria including some that produce a greenish fluorescent water-soluble pigment and some that are saprophytes or plant or animal pathogens; (c) any of a class of yellow water-soluble nitrogenous pigments derived from isoalloxazine and occurring in the form of nucleotides as coenzymes of flavoproteins; (d) capped: first-round pick by the Miami Dolphins.
2. academism: (a) the doctrines of Plato's Academy; (b) the doctrines of Socrates' Syllabi; (c) the doctrines of Sardonnys' School; (d) the doctrines of Nero's Edicts.
3. myoglobin: (a) a white crystalline amide C2H5NO of acetic acid used especially as a solvent and in organic synthesis; (b) a red iron-containing protein pigment in muscles that is similar to hemoglobin; (c) an insoluble mixture containing waxes, fatty acids, soaps, and resinous material that forms a continuous layer on the outer epidermal wall of a plant; (d) a salt of a phenol especially in its capacity as a weak acid.
4. badinage: (a) playful repartee; (b) banal puffery; (c) the illuminating meaning of an experience; (d) the sudden penetration of a heretofore elusive truth.
5. chimera: (a) the dialect of Chinese spoken in and near Xiamen (Chimereii) in southeastern China; (b) translucent white china made with bone ash or calcium phosphate and characterized by whiteness; (c) an unrealizable dream; (d) reflection of a wavering, sometimes distorted visual image.
6. fons et origo: (a) the ending; (b) Latin for "The Fonz ate pizza"; (c) silly, thoughtless, inane; (d) the source.
7. eschatological: (a) of or relating to the end of the world; (b) the theological doctrine of angels or its study; (c) related to the theology dealing with the origin, nature, and destiny of human beings; (d) the biologically oriented study of excrement (as for taxonomic purposes or for the determination of diet).
8. estoppel: (a) a graduated glass tube with a small aperture and stopcock for delivering measured quantities of liquid or for measuring the liquid or gas received or discharged; (b) a legal bar to alleging or denying a fact because of one's own previous actions or words to the contrary; (c) a setting free from the charge of an offense by verdict, sentence, or other legal process; (d) a cooper's work or products.
9. riposte: (a) a usually alcoholic drink taken at the end of the day; (b) to copy or imitate blatantly or unscrupulously; (c) a right (as access to or use of the shore, bed, and water) of one owning riparian land; (d) a retaliatory maneuver or measure.
10. punctilio: (a) something that contrasts or accentuates; (b) careful observance of forms (as in social conduct); (c) any of various standardized marks or signs used in punctuation; (d) capped: the mayor of Revere, Massachusetts.
If errors in printed publications are fooling people into thinking you're careless, witless, and generally out of your mind, ProofreadNOW has the perfect plan to help you remove all that tomfoolery from your production line and win back the hearts, minds, and wallets of your precious readers. We examine the spelling, punctuation, and clarity of your ad, proposal, Web page, brochure, April Fool's Day proclamation, or anything else in print. Off with the dunce hat, on with the tam, and let's get going on making you the fool for quality.
Answers: 1:c 2:a 3:b 4:a 5:c 6:d 7:a 8:b 9:d 10:b Rate Yourself: What color is your fools's cap?
3 to 5 correct: Hey, it was only a job.
6 to 7 correct: Argue your case with the boss.
8 to 9 correct: You can stay.
All 10 correct: Replace your boss!
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| Weekly Grammar Tip |
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Misplaced Modifiers
We often use words or phrases to describe words within sentences, and we determine the meaning of sentences by placing these descriptives next to the words they point to or "modify." A modifier is a word or a phrase that describes something else. You should place it as close as possible to what it describes. Sometimes we are careless and place descriptive phrases away from the words they modify, making our sentences unclear or inaccurate. These phrases are called misplaced modifiers. Be aware of misplaced modifiers that allow for unintended (and often humorous) interpretations. Consider the following: - Here are some helpful suggestions for protecting your valuables from our hotel security staff.
- The young girl was walking the dog in the short skirt.
- The dog was chasing the boy with the spiked collar.
In these examples it is easy to see what went wrong. The security staff are not thieves, the dog isn't wearing a short skirt, and the boy probably doesn't have a spiked collar. Because the modifier is misplaced, we need to think for a second before we understand the intended meaning. The correct versions are: - Here are some helpful suggestions from our hotel security staff for protecting your valuables.
- The young girl in the short skirt was walking the dog.
- The dog with the spiked collar was chasing the boy.
See how the proper placement clarifies the meaning? (You might be surprised to find out how often we make corrections just like these in everyday writing, such as white papers, brochures, and proposals!) By placing the modifiers correctly you can eliminate the possibility that your reader will misunderstand, and you'll have a better chance of getting your point across. Sources: Gregg Reference Manual, and the Web.
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| Word of the Week |
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footle
Pronunciation: FOO-tel
Function: verb
Etymology: probably alteration of footer to waste time
Date: 1573
Definitions: 1: to talk or act foolishly
2: to waste time; TRIFLE, FOOL
Example: "Stop footling around and get to work counting those beans!"
- your boss (30 seconds from now)
Definition source: Merriam-Webster's Eleventh Collegiate Dictionary.
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Copyright 2008 by ProofreadNOW.com, Inc., 447 Boston Street, Topsfield, MA 01983 USA. Published weekly (we try) by the editors at ProofreadNOW.com, Inc. and sent to customers of record and to opt-in guests. Many readers find it is best to read a portion, put it aside, then come back and read more.
Please rate this GrammarTip (10=high, 0=low):
10 - Like having all your picks win the bowl games.
8 - Like having half the day off after New Year's Day.
6 - Like finding a parking space at the mall.
4 - Like finding a parking space near the mall--across the street.
2 - Like working all day the day after New Year's Day.
0 - Like staying home and forgetting the office was open all day the day after New Year's Day...until they tracked you down.
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